When society doesn’t understand a person’s behavior, they are quick to judge and label these people as crazy, weird, or ignorant.
Labels are not explanations. To understand confusing people and situations we must look below the surface to understand the root cause of their actions.
In this article we will discuss and uncover the root causes of the women society is quick to label as “crazy bitches” and “drama queens.” Since these labels are incorrect, we will address these women as traumatized women.
The Root Cause is a Distorted World View Caused by Trauma
She has unresolved pain which she experienced in her childhood and young adulthood. She has been scarred by abusive relationships with men and may have felt abandoned by the significant men in her life.
Because of trauma, her view of the world is distorted. Her life is filled with assumptions, opinions, and fantasies that are not based in reality. She will get emotionally triggered by certain words and behaviors that unconsciously remind her of her dark past.
She has buried her pain deep in the corners of her psyche and the unresolved pain will express itself indirectly in behavior and health.
Understanding Her Mind
- The pain caused from early childhood to young adulthood has robbed her of self-worth. She doesn’t feel pretty enough or smart enough. She feels lesser than or “1-down” on other people. Because of her low self-esteem, she strives for power over other people to escape from her feelings of inferiority.
- Any reminders of her poor self-image, lack of self-worth, or inferiority complex will cause complete chaos and confusion. If you ignore her and don’t give her the attention she needs she will take desperate measures to ensure she gets it. The drama, chaos, and confusion is a way for her to regain control and to also get the attention she desperately needs.
- If she believes she’s lazy, not intelligent, deserves to be alone, she will project these onto you unconsciously. These insecurities need an outlet because they don’t just disappear. She projects these undesirable personality traits that she believes about herself on to you in an attempt to level the playing field.
- She misinterprets certain actions that remind her of her lack of self-worth or her trauma. She will see these gestures as signs of rejection or humiliation. In order to regain the perceived imbalance of power or status, she will start nagging, criticizing, screaming, making accusations, and other forms of emotional manipulation to make you feel guilty or to pay for the pain you reminded her of.
- When she loses her mind and becomes possessed by her emotions she will go on a tangent to vent her pain. She will constantly nag, criticize, insult, and accuse people of doing something wrong. When this happens she’s not really talking to you. Instead, she is talking to all the men in her past and you will symbolize that for her. This is the wrath of an abused, neglected, lonely, and traumatized woman.
10 Red Flags of a Traumatized Woman
1. She has multiple kids all with different men.
2. She will take on masculine jobs to prove to herself and to the men in her past that she’s good enough and she doesn’t need a man.
3. She will try to be the father and mother of her kids.
4. She will make over-generalizations such as all men are cheaters; people cannot be trusted; confident men are toxic. These over-generalizations are far from reality but they serve a purpose in protecting her ego and maintaining her psychological stability.
5. She has given up on dating men and they start to experiment in alternative lifestyles such as dating other women.
6. She has poor coping skills. Instead of open and honest communication or when she feels you have “1-upped” her, she will try to regain control with an aggressive or passive-aggressive tone of voice, body language, and random acts of bitterness and toxicity.
7. She is addicted to substances such as alcohol and prescription medicine.
8. If she is over the age of 40 she lives alone with dogs and cats because she can’t seem to get along with people.
9. She blames her problems on genetics, men, or the world instead of taking responsibility
10. She has trust issues, holds grudges over small things, keeps count of all the wrongs she perceives people have done to her.
Conclusion
A traumatized woman can be summarized as a woman who has insecurities arising from her past so she uses attention-seeking, manipulative, and controlling behavior to maintain her psychological stability. These behaviors manifest themselves as chaotic, confusing, and aggressive.
A traumatized woman should be treated with compassion, understanding, and forgiveness. But it’s also important to tell the difference between a mentally healthy woman and an insecure one because your quality of life will depend on it. A Marriage with a traumatized woman is more like an entrapment that drains any vitality you once had. Being trapped in a marriage to a woman who intentionally creates chaos and confusion to get attention and control is worse than death.
